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I’m De HEAD!!

December 13, 2013 By bwatson Leave a Comment

HeadI’m De’ Head!!

 

 

I’ve heard men actually say that in counseling sessions.  I’ve had to laugh when someone has said that.  I thought for a minute that they would start beating their chest to prove their dominance.  I remember reading in a book that if you had to announce your headship, you weren’t the head.

1 Corinthians 11:3 (NASB95)

3  But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ.

Ephesians 5:23 (NASB95)

23  For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.

These two verses are the two that point to the fact that a man is the head of his wife and therefore is responsible as such.  What does it mean for a man to be the head of his wife?

Here are a couple of thoughts about this Biblical principle.

  1. It is a God-given responsibility.  It does not say anything about the man being smarter or better than the wife.  It is a position that is given based on God’s order and design.
  2. This responsibility has a perfect example as Ephesians 5 says.  A man’s example of how to be the head is Jesus Christ.  You might be thinking that it is an impossibility to follow that example, so why try?  We try because it is what is best for our marriage as well as our relationship with God.
  3. This position can be misused and abused easily.  Many men try to dominate their wives which is not leading them.  Other men try to pacify their wives, which allows the wives to be the leaders.  Both of these are abuses/misuses of the position.

Let’s look at our example and how He interacted with the people He was sent to lead.

 

  1. Jesus was a servant.  The main stories of Jesus serving the disciples is found in John 13.  Jesus washed the feet of his disciples.  Understanding the humility of His actions is Feet Washingextremely important.  Jesus could have required someone else to do this because he was the master, yet he chose to do it himself.  As husbands we must be humble and be willing to serve as it is needed.
  2. Jesus was compassionate.  There are several examples of his compassion with people.  How he interacted with children, how he spoke with the “woman at the well,” how he was non-judgmental with the woman who anointed his feet with the oil and wiped his feet with her hair are a few of the examples that come to my mind this morning.  Husband, are you compassionate with your wife?  Do you care about her feelings, wants, and needs?
  3. Jesus was forgiving.  On several occasions Jesus told people that their sins were forgiven.  I guess the main story of that is found when the Pharisees brought the woman caught in adultery for Jesus to judge.  If we are going to be the godly head of our wife, we have to have a forgiving spirit.  No one has a perfect wife (mine is close tho) and therefore, we must be willing to forgive.

I could continue to show things about Jesus that we are to follow His example in doing as we lead our wives, but I am not trying to write a book with this blog post.

I want to conclude with what I think is the most important aspect of following Jesus’ example of being the head.

Jesus spent time with The Father.  Jesus PrayingMen if we are going to lead our wives as we are supposed to, our relationship with God must be growing and dynamic.  Without spending time with God through prayer and reading His word, we will not know how to follow Jesus’ example and will not be a good head.

When we follow Our Lord’s example, we will NOT have to declare that we are the head. It will be obvious!!

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Mother’s Day 2012

May 10, 2012 By bwatson Leave a Comment

This coming Sunday is Mother’s Day. This day is a day that can carry a lot of emotions with it. Hopefully those emotions are good and positive, but I know that they can be sad and negative for some. Maybe even in the sad emotions there are many happy memories. This Mother’s Day is one that will have many different emotions for me; mostly emotions of joy and thankfulness for my mom and my wife. Then there are the emotions of pride and exultation for the fact that my daughter just gave birth to her 1st born son, Gideon. Finally, there will be some sadness as a deal friend of mine just lost his wife a couple of days ago. He has 5 children and almost 4 grandchildren as the next grandchild could be born by the time anyone reads this. Over the past 20 years or so, we have been extremely close with this couple. Thinking back, we have kept each other’s children. We have gone on mission trips together and choir trips together. We have pranked each other as well as have had some very deep, intimate conversations with each other. I think of the children almost as much as I think of my own. I realize that they each have grown up and now have their own lives and I don’t see them as much any more, yet that love and concern is still there for each one. I’ve even had their pictures on my refrigerator. I can’t say that about very many people’s children, if any that weren’t family members. Wow, as I write this it makes me remember all the good times that we have had as couples as well as families.

I began thinking about Mother’s Day and the wonderful mom God gave me. You see, God chose to have one woman carry me in her womb for those 9 months and then gave me to another woman, my mother, to teach me and train me in the ways of the Lord. I have been asked if I ever wanted to find my “birth-mother,” and my response has always been that I have a mother and do not need another one. Don’t get me wrong, I thank God regularly for the woman who gave birth to me. I also thank God for her courage to give me up for adoption. I can only imagine the pain that decision caused her. I am not naive to believe that she did not hurt over that decision. I pray that she has had the blessing of having other children during her life when she was better prepared to take care of them. But God used her to be the vessel to carry Shirley Watson’s youngest child, me. I think about all the good times that we had as a family, while I was growing up. I can remember all the trips we took as we went on vacations. Some of those memories are from some of the silly things that took place, while others are from some of the serious times we had as a family. If I were to write about all my memories, you would not want to read any further. I just want to communicate that the constant has been the fact that my mom along with my dad have always been there for me. They have been an example of what it means to be committed to one another and to their children…now their grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Their commitment to each other stems from the fact that they have been committed to the Lord for most of their lives. What a blue-print to follow as I look back on the things from my childhood to today.

The second mom that comes to my mind today as I write this is my bride, Lisa. She and I have been married almost 27 years and have reared 2 children. I think back at how I was in the beginning of our marriage. We had Danielle on our 14 month anniversary, so it seems like Lisa has been a mom our entire marriage. I thank God that she was dedicated to being a mom and continues to be so today. I was not around very much with going to school and being a youth minister. I allowed those things to get in the way of me being a husband and a daddy. I thank God that my bride was not distracted from her responsibilities as I was. I believe that Lisa has been and is the ultimate mom for her children and now her grandson. Again, her dedication to the Lord is first and foremost in her life.

While I am bragging on my children’s mom, I am reminded that I do have

a second mom in my life, my mother-in-law. She is a very godly and caring mom as well.She and my father-in-law have been married for 54 years and have shown a sincere love and dedication to one another as well as their children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. For my wife to be such a good mom, she had to have a very good teacher and trainer. I thank Marjorie McCloskey for being such a good mom for my wife growing up and even now.

The final mom that is on my mind today is my daughter. Danielle Barker. When I think about Dani and the fact that she is celebrating her 1st Mother’s Day, I feel so much pride and a sense of accomplishment. I thank God for the fact that Dani has had many examples to follow and she is committed to the Lord, her husband, her son, and her calling. I don’t think that I could be any more proud of who she is today. Now, I want to give God the honor and glory that He deserves for all of this.

This Mother’s Day, I would encourage each of you to thank God for all the moms in your life!

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